My friend Yvonne makes the best goat milk fudge known to man. Seriously, it's the best fudge ever. Since the beginning of time. I'm not lying. I think she does mail order if you're interested. This weekend I'm helping her sell her fudge at a local craft fair. I hope we're able to increase her income enough so that she'll be able to tell her husband to go fuck himself. He's fucked everyone else in the county. He might as well have a go at himself. Yvonne deserves better but for now she needs help with the farm as she works several jobs and cares for one toddler and a tween while useless marriage partner has drawn unemployment for the last three or four years while complaining about doing anything to help. I'd wish bad things on him if it would help my friend draw on a large life insurance policy.
I have one of the last remaining ducklings in the house recuperating from a broken leg. I don't know if it will survive this. That leg is pretty useless and I would have higher hopes if it stayed tucked up under the duckling but it drags behind and that's not a good sign. I'm not too fond of having a duck in the house but for now I really can't leave it outside. Have you ever smelled a duck? Ew. Ew to the nth degree. I'm changing the papers several times a day. Oh yeah, loving the duck poop I am... not.
Sunday has gone back to jumping the fence and meeting me bright and early in the yard. If only I could find where she's getting over the fence I could fix it before she gets hurt on a pile of hubby's garbage (piled everywhere without rhyme or reason. I'm considering a call to Hoarders. It's genetic with this bunch). I've walked all over the place looking for the tell-tale landing hoofprints but I can't find anyplace that gives the most remote suggestion where she's getting out. Sunday can coon jump 5 ft so anything under that height is easy pickings for her. (Mules and donkeys, unlike horses who need a running go at something, can jump from a standstill. They raise up on their hind legs and then spring across whatever is in front of them. The term 'coon jump' came from when mules were ridden on racoon hunts and had to jump fallen logs, etc. Mule Trivia 101) I'm starting to think my dear Sunday is levitating herself to the middle of the yard. I wouldn't put it past her to have this particular skillset. She is after all a mule and mules are magical creatures. Trust me on that one.
Best quote I've heard in a while... A half-ass is better than a whole horse. Love it. Want a tattoo but will settle for a t-shirt.
Time to fill my pockets with noms and head out to do the morning feeding. They all get so excited to see me. 'Hey look, it's the bitch with the grain bucket'!! It's not much but it's better than 'Hey look, let's stomp her'.
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